You want a confession ?

subwifeuk32

subwifeuk32

Member
OFC Regular
Ok, I am writing this for myself, as I am starting to feel submissive again. Feel free to comment or not. I was very disappointed to find out this site is mainly for fantasists, and even more so that most people are using other people's photographs. Some copied from well know porn sites, others assuming the identity of actors, newreaders etc. Maybe the last real person forgot to close the door on the way out ? So, basically I'll write for myself, as a real person who isn't here for any dubious reason.
 
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subwifeuk32 said:
Ok, I am writing this for myself, as I am starting to feel submissive again. Feel free to comment or not. I was very disappointed to find out this site is mainly for fantasists, and even more so that most people are using other people's photographs. Some copied from well know porn sites, others assuming the identity oif actors, newreaders etc. Maybe the last real person forgot to close the door on the way out ? So, basically I'll write for myself, as a real person who isn't here for any dubious reason.
My confession, is that despite my life as a groupie, having sex with anyone who has even the smallest claim to fame in entertainment; I do also get cravings to be abused. Mentally as well as physically. I don't for one minute believe that anyone on here will understand those feelings.
I would say I get these cravings every three months or so. If they are quickly satisfied, I am ok for at least three months, wondering why the hell I put myself up for abuse in the first place and promising myself I won't do it again. If they aren't satisfied, it can go one of two ways. It builds and builds until I do something stupid, or it fizzles out and leaves me depressed. I don't usually share these feelings with my husband, it's my problem and I deal with it myself.

One Saturday lunchtime my hubby came home from work and said he was going to some far away sporting event with a mate, and would be back around midnight. I had been having feelings of worthlessness and cravings for abuse building for a few weeks, and suddenly felt the need to get them fulfilled. It's like I want to go somewhere and be subjected to things I will hate, but not be allowed to back out. I had a few phone numbers and e.mail addresses for people I had seen in contact ads in the past, and as soon as hubby had gone out I started ringing and e.mailing, without any success. I went for a shower and shaved my pubic hair off and thought about how I was going to get abused. Find a seedy pub ? Hang about on a street corner ? I've done both when I have been desperate.
I tried one of the phone numbers again, in another city, but someone who had sounded the right type. This time he answered, so I nervously explained who I was and reminded him we had spoke briefly a few months ago.

I'll continue later when I get chance with some examples - right here -----
Click to expand...
..Hello.. You have 'piqued' my interest, I am like the other side of the equation.. I am somewhat alpha sexually ..but I am also fairly vanilla within a relationship.. But a 'switch gets thrown', every once in awhile, and I want a thorough-going slut, with a need to be roughly used. Maybe it's a common trait, but I am soon over in the wrong part of town, picking up a likely prospect with her own place, and time on her hands. Afterwards? I feel good ..
 
Yes that is exactly it Manx. You get it, exactly the right term - "a switch gets thrown" - although in my case it builds up, the longer I fight it, the more desperate the situation gets.
 
I think from a psychological point of view, we all have a certain self destructiveness. I have been on sites like this for years, and even though I think I am happily married, I think sub-consciously I get off on the risk of being here, and the risk of meeting someone else, or making a connection with someone that challenges what I have in real-life. I think the answers as to why you need to be abused could come back to simply wanting some kind of connection with someone. I mean, why do some people come here and pretend to be women? Because they are sad idiots? Yes.. But they are also trying to get some form of attention in their sad little lives. Perhaps, your example is an extreme version of this, where you need to "feel" something, even if it is abusive. The flip side being that it clearly helps get you off
 
Although I haven't had time to finish the opening posting yet, there is one thing that really intrigues me, and that is women who seem to actually enjoy getting battered.
When I have communicated with men who sound the right type, usually by e.mail via contact sites, (I haven't done this for a long time though), I try not to lead them in any direction. I wouldn't want them to do anything because they think that is what I want. I want them to be real and do what they want to do, and I am secretly craving that they will be into something extreme that I will absolutely hate.
A couple of years ago I heard shouting on the street outside my house and there was a couple walking past and he was yelling at the girl. He seemed so typical of "the type". Probably about 30, 6 feet tall, well built, bit scruffy. The girlfriends always seem to be under 20, slim, and really good looking and well dressed. After they walked past he punched her straight in the face, and she fell to the floor. He walked on, she got up and chased after him, trying to reason with him. He punched her in the stomach and then again in the face and she was down again, but still got up and chased after him. I saw them a few times and it was always the same.
A few months later I was on a bus and a very similar couple got on. He sat in the only vacant seat downstairs near the front, she paid for both their fares, and looked round and started to go upstairs. He shouted to her "stand here". She came back and stood next to him, both silent, and then he put his hand between her bare legs and gripped her thigh, moving up under her mini skirt and he was obviously fingering her as she squirmed embarrassingly. Even when seats became vacent he kept he stood there. They got off a stop before me, and I realised they must have moved into the flats at the bottom of our road.
A few days later, it was exactly the same as the other couple. Shouting, I looked out, he had her by the throat shaking her about, then pinned her to a fence and punched her in the face. By the time he had laid her out three times, a man and his son from down the road came up to help her. The thug walked on, she got up and chased after him and he laid her out again. At the top of the road, two police cars stopped them, and an ambulance. She was fighting with the police before she was put in the ambulance and he was arrested. Two days later they were back, eventually disappearing as quick as they had arrived.
NOW - what is it like in their bedroom. I would love to know. It makes me shake all over just thinking about it !
I did see an ad a couple of years ago from someone who was obviously "this type". I swapped a few messages with him, anonymously. He was offering a weekend or week's accomodation for any woman, preferably married, who wanted to sample "the other way of life". Part of the deal was that the woman should bring money to keep them in booze and takeaways, would not be able to leave, would be treated like dirt, stripped, beaten and emotionally abused. I was surprised that he was actualy very intelligent.
Well I would never dream of signing up for that.... but if I found it accidentally ? Hmm.
 
Well I stand by my point up there, even if you have a pretty extreme case of it, it seems to come back to a level of needing to feel something. As for why women stay with bastards, I'll never quite understand it and have seen it myself so often
 
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