Nostalgia

That's so lovely xx
and this is my thread creation so if anyone has an issue with recency I will fight you!
@DreamEater any friend of @FallenAngel-Lez is a friend of mine, so yiu can now count a middle aged irish girl with a touch of silliness and sauciness to your list of acquaintances! She was such a support to me mot too long ago during a tough time, like she undoubtedly was for you back then. We've both been touched by an angel ❤️

They seriously need a blush emoji. Thank you so much darling. God, I don't know what to say. Just thank you.
 
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I don't doubt for a second that She has been there for you like She was there for me when I most needed it. We had talked before that but it was nothing too deep and then She picked up on something I said to give away I wasn't doing well and She luckily for us got nosey and wanted to find out why and yeah. I am happy she did and here we are almost 6 years later. Crazy. Silliness and sauciness sound like a great partnership haha.
Need the N on describe yourself lol
 
ok this one has been on my mind for a while now wasn't sure if i should share it here or not...
on my 18th birthday i invited a bunch of my friends to my Bachelors pad for my birthday party. after stopping at the 3 bars in town for my free drinks. so here we are music blaring 5 of my friends, my neighbors, and my brother the whole point of this story, all having a good time i was already drunk by this point. they were pressuring me to take a shot of tequila (to kill ya). i knew it would too much. long story short peer pressure won out. just as i swallowed my shot my brother dropped to his knee and punched me in the balls.

shortly after i got the news of his passing, i was talking to my sister i told her that story and added "i have never wanted to be punched in the balls like i do right now."
 
ok this one has been on my mind for a while now wasn't sure if i should share it here or not...
on my 18th birthday i invited a bunch of my friends to my Bachelors pad for my birthday party. after stopping at the 3 bars in town for my free drinks. so here we are music blaring 5 of my friends, my neighbors, and my brother the whole point of this story, all having a good time i was already drunk by this point. they were pressuring me to take a shot of tequila (to kill ya). i knew it would too much. long story short peer pressure won out. just as i swallowed my shot my brother dropped to his knee and punched me in the balls.

shortly after i got the news of his passing, i was talking to my sister i told her that story and added "i have never wanted to be punched in the balls like i do right now."
Wish inxould justbhug you tight now Kendra
Thank you for sharing xx
 
ok this one has been on my mind for a while now wasn't sure if i should share it here or not...
on my 18th birthday i invited a bunch of my friends to my Bachelors pad for my birthday party. after stopping at the 3 bars in town for my free drinks. so here we are music blaring 5 of my friends, my neighbors, and my brother the whole point of this story, all having a good time i was already drunk by this point. they were pressuring me to take a shot of tequila (to kill ya). i knew it would too much. long story short peer pressure won out. just as i swallowed my shot my brother dropped to his knee and punched me in the balls.

shortly after i got the news of his passing, i was talking to my sister i told her that story and added "i have never wanted to be punched in the balls like i do right now."
That is a beautiful story. I've no doubt your brother and your dad would love who you are now and who you're becoming
 
I wish I had a solace like I used. When I was young during winters getting my skates, my stick and few pucks and going out to the outdoor rink. I would be there for hours. Like up to 6-8 hours. Thinking of nothing but just doing. Not thinking about things that were happening at home or whatever. A place that truly made your mind quiet. I wish I had that now when I really needed it or maybe that was a thing that kept things in place for me back then. I am not sure if all this anxiety is new(ish) or just a collection of things rather than the specific point in time when it started.
 
I wish I had a solace like I used. When I was young during winters getting my skates, my stick and few pucks and going out to the outdoor rink. I would be there for hours. Like up to 6-8 hours. Thinking of nothing but just doing. Not thinking about things that were happening at home or whatever. A place that truly made your mind quiet. I wish I had that now when I really needed it or maybe that was a thing that kept things in place for me back then. I am not sure if all this anxiety is new(ish) or just a collection of things rather than the specific point in time when it started.
My sweet prince, I so feel that. I'll always be here for you as you have for me. I'm not fucking up again, I promise.
 
3-7 When I was beaten and locked up.
7-9 When I lost my home.
18 When the police came to interview me.
19 When my father was sentenced to a prison and a mental institution and I went there to confront him.
24 When my father broke out of the prison and contacted me.
28 When my father was brought back to prison, only wanted me to visit him if I went there with his new gf who wanted me to call her mum and I decided to not invest my energy in him anymore.
49 When my father contacted me and I decided to reconnect.
51 When my father died and I thanked him for EVERYTHING he had done because it had made me into the person I am today.
 
3-7 When I was beaten and locked up.
7-9 When I lost my home.
18 When the police came to interview me.
19 When my father was sentenced to a prison and a mental institution and I went there to confront him.
24 When my father broke out of the prison and contacted me.
28 When my father was brought back to prison, only wanted me to visit him if I went there with his new gf who wanted me to call her mum and I decided to not invest my energy in him anymore.
49 When my father contacted me and I decided to reconnect.
51 When my father died and I thanked him for EVERYTHING he had done because it had made me into the person I am today.
Every person has a story which defines who they are and molds them. Most of the time we know not of the battles others have fought. And so quick and easy we can dismiss people without truly knowing what struggles they’ve had to go through. Bless you and thank you for sharing that.
 
5 When I got my first kiss with tongue from my grandfather.
6 When he started to insert things into my body.
7 When I told my mother about my grandfather, who divorced my father who couldn't handle the separation and wanted to kill us so we had to go live elsewhere and he would always find us and relocate again.
9 When my mother was brought to a mental institution and I voluntered to stay with our meanest aunt because I couldn't do that to my 3 younger brothers.
10 When 9 happened again, but now I had to live with a neighbour.
11 When 9 and 10 happened again, this time I had to live at the home of a classmate.
12 When 9 and 10 and 11 happened again, I could go live with the neighbour again.
14 When my therapist had contacted my father where I had to live temporarily (because my mother was hospitalized again) about the sexual abuse, but did not tell me and so when I got home at my father's place from school he was waiting for me. He had packed my stuff in a garbage bag and he told me that I had told lies about him and was not welcome to stay with him any longer. Fortunately I could live with a girl from school.
15 This time my mother was again taken to a mental hospital and I decided that I could live alone while my brothers lived elsewhere in foster care. However, I did not have money and there was little food and so I went to the mall and shoplifted. When my mother came back from the mental institution and had lost control of my brothers who would only listen to me, she told me that I had to leave the house. I went to live with my 18 y/o bf. The psychiatrist from the mental hospital told me that she was suffering from schizophrenia.
24 When my mother called the company I was working for as a callcentre manager and told my team members that I was a filthy whore and a cunt, I can still see how shocked these poor people were.
28 When my son was born and my mother took him for a walk that ended 5 hours later than expected.
41 When I was the only person in the world my mother allowed to take care of her in her final weeks when the cancer was eating her body. She could not hold her schizophrenia medication and so she was in a psychotic state while dying from cancer.
42 When I stood at her grave with the tombstone I had designed for her. It reads:
Dear Mum,
Love is what you taught us.
Love You
On each of the four corners of the stone the first letters of my brothers names and mine are chisled.
 
5 When I got my first kiss with tongue from my grandfather.
6 When he started to insert things into my body.
7 When I told my mother about my grandfather, who divorced my father who couldn't handle the separation and wanted to kill us so we had to go live elsewhere and he would always find us and relocate again.
9 When my mother was brought to a mental institution and I voluntered to stay with our meanest aunt because I couldn't do that to my 3 younger brothers.
10 When 9 happened again, but now I had to live with a neighbour.
11 When 9 and 10 happened again, this time I had to live at the home of a classmate.
12 When 9 and 10 and 11 happened again, I could go live with the neighbour again.
14 When my therapist had contacted my father where I had to live temporarily (because my mother was hospitalized again) about the sexual abuse, but did not tell me and so when I got home at my father's place from school he was waiting for me. He had packed my stuff in a garbage bag and he told me that I had told lies about him and was not welcome to stay with him any longer. Fortunately I could live with a girl from school.
15 This time my mother was again taken to a mental hospital and I decided that I could live alone while my brothers lived elsewhere in foster care. However, I did not have money and there was little food and so I went to the mall and shoplifted. When my mother came back from the mental institution and had lost control of my brothers who would only listen to me, she told me that I had to leave the house. I went to live with my 18 y/o bf. The psychiatrist from the mental hospital told me that she was suffering from schizophrenia.
24 When my mother called the company I was working for as a callcentre manager and told my team members that I was a filthy whore and a cunt, I can still see how shocked these poor people were.
28 When my son was born and my mother took him for a walk that ended 5 hours later than expected.
41 When I was the only person in the world my mother allowed to take care of her in her final weeks when the cancer was eating her body. She could not hold her schizophrenia medication and so she was in a psychotic state while dying from cancer.
42 When I stood at her grave with the tombstone I had designed for her. It reads:
Dear Mum,
Love is what you taught us.
Love You
On each of the four corners of the stone the first letters of my brothers names and mine are chisled.
oh my god hun what a life you have endured. To be the woman you are today is such a testament to your determination and will to overcome anything. You're an inspiration x
 
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