A
AkshayGoodOne
Guest
Talking to Self.
Hi.
Thanks for staying by and taking out time to read this. I am writing this testimony with all my thought and commitment. So, I hope I don’t end up disappointing you in any way. Your love and support have always been paramount in keeping me happy with my experience at this site.
I just wanted to confess about one of the many flaws I possess, which could make me seem psychotic. Yes, I talk to myself and have been caught multiple times doing so. I’ve often been made to feel embarrassed at the exposé, but in my loneliest of moments, this habit of mine has always proved therapeutic. Hence, I just can’t convince myself changing this behaviour of mine.
First of all, change is a hard thing to go through and requires the fuel of love and time. Well, it is hard because now, I’ve been programmed by life to a huge extent, with all the damages and bugs my childhood and later past life inflicted upon my mind. I am now a certain ‘kind’ of person – The ‘kind’ that some would love while others would scorn at. Well, Sorry. Being born under certain ‘kinds’ of financial and social conditions, having had to associate with certain ‘kinds’, or not getting to be with certain ‘kinds’, having had to face certain ‘kinds’ of pains or enjoy certain ‘kinds’ of pleasures was never in my control.
I have been a slave of circumstances, a function of life. This universe has employed me as a bonded labourer and I just don’t know who to complain for the unjust, unfair treatment and all the exploitation or misfortune I face in life. People say, there’s one “God”, which we address our problems to, hoping for a remedy. But guess, this “God” is busy with far greater pursuits, hence showing no obtrusive maintenance work around us in response to our complaints. We’re all lost, with our emotions, our boons or banes and our dreams, in a very miniscule blue grain of this universe.
Well, in the end, the mess you create or become, the state you’re in, the resulting frustration and sadness and your liabilities are only yours to bear. You’re just at par with all other inhabitants, the bonded labourers of this universe, in this regard. The appreciation, the love, the favours, the advices and assistances, physical, emotional, mental, sexual and financial support or charity, all these that people give you are nothing short of miracles. They do relieve your condition, but they aren’t guaranteed in life.
So, expecting these things to serendipitously occur at every phase of your life, vehemently betting your energies and emotional stability over these things is risky, because, of course, people are uncertain, just like you are. The economics and interpersonal transactions of these ‘miracles’, love and good-will, is a far under-researched and incomprehensible thing to be wise about.
You have a limited resource of positive energy, which you put into thoughts to create feelings or emotions. You also put this energy into expecting and preparing yourself mentally for these unguaranteed ‘miracles’, to obtain returns of satisfaction, validation and self-confidence in life. Quite often, you don’t get the returns. Now, if you had bet so much energy into it, you may go emotionally broke, further craving for the ‘miracles’ and investing your scant energies you need to keep yourself normal into them and possibly landing into emotional bankruptcy. You could’ve invested your energies into creating ‘assets’ that earns you these ‘miracles’ which in this case are the ‘miracles’ you provide to other people, but, well, you take these things for granted.
You are an organisation that deals with this business transactions of ‘miracles’ and works to earn the satisfaction in your life. The board of directors consist of three members: Your body, your mind and your heart. You are on your heart’s side (Team soul and heart ) , which gets most piqued by your emotional bankruptcy. The body is the enforcement, the link to all the information your board of directors receive. The mind is the CEO, the principle decision maker, with all the statistical tools and cognitive biases. Your soul/heart is the president, the rubber stamp who gives a final go for all actions, dreams, visions and plans as decided by your board of directors.
Sometimes, we might come to think we’re always in full control of our life. Just consider this proposition – Alcohol, drugs, sexual stimulation and extreme luxury bribe the sensors of your body with release of dopamine, serotonin and other endorphins, so your body may propose that this ‘epicurean’ state is what your organization should go for. Hence, you may be fooled to convince you’re going the right path. Your soul gets micromanaged, and the organisation moves ahead towards the path of dreaded bankruptcy.
Your soul has only a one-third of the shares in this organisation. But there’s a way you can rule your own organisation. Your mind works on logic and sound propositions. One good thing is, you can take the help of your mind’s tools and intelligence and use your body’s resources to create these sound propositions. You can, in this way, guide and control your body and mind into achieving those ‘miracles’ in abundance, for a life full of happiness, prosperity and satisfaction.
You must be thinking I went way off topic there . But, no.
I spend my time thinking about life, my own conditions and characteristics flaws and how to get above my situations in life. Sadly, the only brainstorming partner I have, is me. Finding an empty space, in my room, I spend time alone, and talk to to discover myself.
Just know this, my dear reader friend, I’ll do whatever I can to please you and bring ‘miracles’ in your life.
Thank You
PS: I kinda tried making this long, tedious testimony some fun and tacky, with inspiration from @Misha000 ’s style of posting
Hi.
Thanks for staying by and taking out time to read this. I am writing this testimony with all my thought and commitment. So, I hope I don’t end up disappointing you in any way. Your love and support have always been paramount in keeping me happy with my experience at this site.
I just wanted to confess about one of the many flaws I possess, which could make me seem psychotic. Yes, I talk to myself and have been caught multiple times doing so. I’ve often been made to feel embarrassed at the exposé, but in my loneliest of moments, this habit of mine has always proved therapeutic. Hence, I just can’t convince myself changing this behaviour of mine.
First of all, change is a hard thing to go through and requires the fuel of love and time. Well, it is hard because now, I’ve been programmed by life to a huge extent, with all the damages and bugs my childhood and later past life inflicted upon my mind. I am now a certain ‘kind’ of person – The ‘kind’ that some would love while others would scorn at. Well, Sorry. Being born under certain ‘kinds’ of financial and social conditions, having had to associate with certain ‘kinds’, or not getting to be with certain ‘kinds’, having had to face certain ‘kinds’ of pains or enjoy certain ‘kinds’ of pleasures was never in my control.
I have been a slave of circumstances, a function of life. This universe has employed me as a bonded labourer and I just don’t know who to complain for the unjust, unfair treatment and all the exploitation or misfortune I face in life. People say, there’s one “God”, which we address our problems to, hoping for a remedy. But guess, this “God” is busy with far greater pursuits, hence showing no obtrusive maintenance work around us in response to our complaints. We’re all lost, with our emotions, our boons or banes and our dreams, in a very miniscule blue grain of this universe.
Well, in the end, the mess you create or become, the state you’re in, the resulting frustration and sadness and your liabilities are only yours to bear. You’re just at par with all other inhabitants, the bonded labourers of this universe, in this regard. The appreciation, the love, the favours, the advices and assistances, physical, emotional, mental, sexual and financial support or charity, all these that people give you are nothing short of miracles. They do relieve your condition, but they aren’t guaranteed in life.
So, expecting these things to serendipitously occur at every phase of your life, vehemently betting your energies and emotional stability over these things is risky, because, of course, people are uncertain, just like you are. The economics and interpersonal transactions of these ‘miracles’, love and good-will, is a far under-researched and incomprehensible thing to be wise about.
You have a limited resource of positive energy, which you put into thoughts to create feelings or emotions. You also put this energy into expecting and preparing yourself mentally for these unguaranteed ‘miracles’, to obtain returns of satisfaction, validation and self-confidence in life. Quite often, you don’t get the returns. Now, if you had bet so much energy into it, you may go emotionally broke, further craving for the ‘miracles’ and investing your scant energies you need to keep yourself normal into them and possibly landing into emotional bankruptcy. You could’ve invested your energies into creating ‘assets’ that earns you these ‘miracles’ which in this case are the ‘miracles’ you provide to other people, but, well, you take these things for granted.
You are an organisation that deals with this business transactions of ‘miracles’ and works to earn the satisfaction in your life. The board of directors consist of three members: Your body, your mind and your heart. You are on your heart’s side (Team soul and heart ) , which gets most piqued by your emotional bankruptcy. The body is the enforcement, the link to all the information your board of directors receive. The mind is the CEO, the principle decision maker, with all the statistical tools and cognitive biases. Your soul/heart is the president, the rubber stamp who gives a final go for all actions, dreams, visions and plans as decided by your board of directors.
Sometimes, we might come to think we’re always in full control of our life. Just consider this proposition – Alcohol, drugs, sexual stimulation and extreme luxury bribe the sensors of your body with release of dopamine, serotonin and other endorphins, so your body may propose that this ‘epicurean’ state is what your organization should go for. Hence, you may be fooled to convince you’re going the right path. Your soul gets micromanaged, and the organisation moves ahead towards the path of dreaded bankruptcy.
Your soul has only a one-third of the shares in this organisation. But there’s a way you can rule your own organisation. Your mind works on logic and sound propositions. One good thing is, you can take the help of your mind’s tools and intelligence and use your body’s resources to create these sound propositions. You can, in this way, guide and control your body and mind into achieving those ‘miracles’ in abundance, for a life full of happiness, prosperity and satisfaction.
You must be thinking I went way off topic there . But, no.
I spend my time thinking about life, my own conditions and characteristics flaws and how to get above my situations in life. Sadly, the only brainstorming partner I have, is me. Finding an empty space, in my room, I spend time alone, and talk to to discover myself.
Just know this, my dear reader friend, I’ll do whatever I can to please you and bring ‘miracles’ in your life.
Thank You
PS: I kinda tried making this long, tedious testimony some fun and tacky, with inspiration from @Misha000 ’s style of posting
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