Faulty jump leads.
Don't get me started.
If I'm posting tooo many, just say STOP.
This 1 I got from my old school teacher I'm friends with on Facebook.
Don't get me started.
If I'm posting tooo many, just say STOP.
This 1 I got from my old school teacher I'm friends with on Facebook.
I went over to this Asian's chick house last night.
We were making out on the couch and I suggested we try 69.
So she got up and made me crispy chicken with fried rice.
We were making out on the couch and I suggested we try 69.
So she got up and made me crispy chicken with fried rice.
My friend met her husband at a local fayer coconut stand.
They both hit it off straight away.
They both hit it off straight away.
My husband lost a wrestling match with the invisible man.
He just didn't know what he was up against.
He just didn't know what he was up against.
Not sure non British people would understand.
I was waiting to cross the road for 20 minutes when a guy walked up to me and said that there was a zebra crossing down the road.
I said that I hope that he was having more luck.
I was waiting to cross the road for 20 minutes when a guy walked up to me and said that there was a zebra crossing down the road.
I said that I hope that he was having more luck.
My torch stopped working the other day, so I took it to a shop where 4 German guys worked. All 4 guys were called Hans.
So, it seems many Hans make light work.
So, it seems many Hans make light work.
My wife told me that in order to have peace at home, we had to leave our problems at the door.
Now she's mad at me because she's locked outside.
Now she's mad at me because she's locked outside.
The inventor of the jigsaw puzzle died yesterday.
His wife is said to be in peices.
His wife is said to be in peices.
Q. What do painters do when they get a cold?.
A. Put another coat on.
A. Put another coat on.
Just heard that they are not making shortbread any longer.
What do you call a lesbian with braces?
A box cutter
A box cutter
Not a joke, but legit.
But still funny.
Keir Starmer has finally stopped a boat from crossing the channel.
Unfortunately it's HMS Dragon.
But still funny.
Keir Starmer has finally stopped a boat from crossing the channel.
Unfortunately it's HMS Dragon.
Q. Why are dumb blonde jokes one liners?.
A. So men can understand them.
Wow, so untrue.
A. So men can understand them.
Wow, so untrue.
He finds a stool at the bar, sits down and orders a beer.
After a few sips he beckons for the bartender and says, "Hey bartender, want to hear a blonde joke?"
The bartender says, "Sure, but before you do tell it, you should know there's a massive bodybuilding world champion sitting next to you. They are blonde. Do you still want to tell the joke?"
The blind man says yes.
The bartender says, "Okay, but before you do tell it, you should know there's the biggest and most dangerous biker I've ever seen sitting on your other side. They are blonde. Do you still want to tell the joke?"
The blind man once again says yes.
The bartender says, "Okay, but before you do tell it, you should know that I'm the biggest and baddest bartender in this town. I've thrown out drunks big and small and fought them too. I am blonde. Do you still want to tell the joke?"
The blind man pauses for a second and says "Nevermind, I wouldn't want to have to explain it three times."
After a few sips he beckons for the bartender and says, "Hey bartender, want to hear a blonde joke?"
The bartender says, "Sure, but before you do tell it, you should know there's a massive bodybuilding world champion sitting next to you. They are blonde. Do you still want to tell the joke?"
The blind man says yes.
The bartender says, "Okay, but before you do tell it, you should know there's the biggest and most dangerous biker I've ever seen sitting on your other side. They are blonde. Do you still want to tell the joke?"
The blind man once again says yes.
The bartender says, "Okay, but before you do tell it, you should know that I'm the biggest and baddest bartender in this town. I've thrown out drunks big and small and fought them too. I am blonde. Do you still want to tell the joke?"
The blind man pauses for a second and says "Nevermind, I wouldn't want to have to explain it three times."